Tuesday, 31. March 2009

sometimes

sometimes...i feel too old..........i feel too mature..............................i feel like being surrounded by kids...
sometimes...i feel too young....too young for what i have to do.....i feel like being surrounded by grown ups....
sometimes...i feel alone...........like i am the only one.....................i feel like being surrounded by missunderstanding me
sometimes...i feel alive.............i feel like i am finally living............i feel like being surrounded by ppl who know me, understand me, who feel alike


sometimes i just want the time to stop like this...like snapping my fingers and everything should stop...calmness is what i need...everything is happening so fast..let me be a child again...just for one day....no fears, no doubts, no tomorrow just living in yet without caring about anyone/body...just me and the world....juste pour une seconde, un instant..j'en ai marre de penser à l'avenir...j'en ai marre de preparer mon proche...je veux vivre...sinon maintenant...à partir de quand ? i know i should take care about everything...but well...where am i going to be then....i just have this single life and every moment am not doing what i want to seems like a wasted one.....pourquoi puis-je pas me dégager de mes obligations..c'est quoi la vie ? Ich will leben....aber ich finde kein zu Hause...keine Heimat...everywhere i am...da wohne ich nur....ohne mich dort daheim zu fühlen....aber wieso? Suis-je extirpé ? De toutes...mes racines..aber manchmal fühlt es sich so an als würde ich einfach meine Zeit verschenden...einfach so....oft...fast immer...als ob ich etwas mit meinem Leben anfangen sollte...that sounds ludicrously...like something coming from above...aufgedrängt von...jemand? aber wer? wer sagt eigentlich, dass man das tun soll. Und wieso wird man dann dumm angemacht wenn man was anderes macht? was ist daran falsch seine Träume/Wünsche zu verfolgen...n'est-ce pas ce qu'on prêche ? dlaczego? wenn sich niemand daran hält? I don't wanna sleep...right now...je sais que je vais être crevé à la fac...tant pis...why being like everyone....why being normal....c'est pas moi....chui pas comme ça ! Une nuit blanche...is it that what i need?

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